Godammit. Any of y'all just…feel awful about their life's trajectory, and you make these wishy-washy blog posts or maybe videos or social posts or whatever, where you go "I have decided that I'm going to do some...thing" and then end up with months of radio silence cause surprise, the thing's actually hard (or, let’s be real, takes work)? Or other shit gets in the way? Or whatever excuses you have and you feel bad and you're just exhausted cause working a shitty job and paying bills and dodging news headlines like a tommy gun rat-tat-tatting at your feet is a lot to deal with already?

Well I do! Man. Fuck. It's too much man, what the fuck's going on? What's my place in all this? And I have a child??? The audacity of anyone in this accursed timeline to bring forth progeny. And I have to give her a good life, convince her there's good in the world as I myself…well actually I do see it, just not in…*waves arms around* alla this. But you know what I mean? I thank my parents for the gift of life, but jeeeeezus do you really win some and lose some.

We really oughta been winning some! A lot more than some! The fuck’s up with billionaires? Gimme dat money fool! Y’know Maslow’s heirarchy of needs? Rich people got the bottom two rungs, and the weight of the money’s squashing the others out. Meanwhile, we sorry fucks barely get up there cause we got bills to pay. Just even it out, maaan.

Shit wait wait, that’s its own thing. Let’s get back to: where. WHERE does life fit into this post-capitalist Matrix nightmare?

Fuck careers

Look at me, snivelling about how “oooh I should have been a designer” and then proceeding to snivel privately instead of publicly to avoid confronting that I don’t put in the work. I don’t wanna do shit anymore. I don’t want a career. I want a JOB. That PAYS me decent, and lets me FUCK OFF. I don’t want to be the very best, like no one ever was. Especially not at optimizing user interfaces to maximize user engagement. FUCK that.

When I “left” the tech industry (i.e. no one would hire me), I said I was tired of all the bullshit. Now that I’m in a different thing altogether…I should have known this, but…whoop de doo Basil, it’s just a different flavor of bullshit! I’m tired man. Just gimme my money. I don’t want to serve any company’s needs. I want to serve me (and serve cunt. mwah!).

Fuck: life, or rather, its…what’s the word. Prerequisites?

Life’s—life’s actually pretty great man! As long as you get to live it! (and you live somewhere that isn’t awful, like, oooh, ummm, the Philippines.) Humanity’s really good at some stuff. Have y’all seen, like…movies??? Those are things we just watch like whatever, so taken for granted that that Netflix “Are you still watching?” screen is not even a real question anymore. The answer’s stopped mattering.

So they were filming a movie on our street one time. Made it look like New York. Changed the license plates on the parked cars, made all the lights yellow, brought NY rubbish bins, put up a fake store to fill in an empty storefront, and, crucially: added more garbage onto the streets. So authentic! And there were cranes and and lighting people and whatever crew they got just buzzing around the whole day. All to shoot what’s probably not even 15 minutes of a complete film. It’s really cool seeing that get made in front of us. Some people actually do cool shit like that. That’s real nice. Even if whatever that movie was turns out bad, I saw the work put into it. That shit was real.

As an aside to anyone making anything and just throwing it out there: yeah, I see your shitty thing. I love you. I can feel how happy you were making it, and how embarassed/proud you are putting it out into the world. Keep doing it baby. It’s lovely.

We should all have the capacity to be doing cool shit like that. There’s probably 6000 Rembrandts out there not materializing cause some asshole thought their side of the mountain looked like a nice harvesting point.

Another aside: Oh my god how do these fucking billionaires creep into everything. I guess all I’m’s saying’s is, in an age of incredible abundance, a more even spread would be…really nice, for starters.

Fuck—let’s do something, dudes. Squeeze all that can be squoze.

I uh, I. Where was I going. I like a lotta things man! There’s so much nice shit out there. I think what I’m trying to say is: let’s enjoy it! Fucken—let me enjoy it!!! Let me—let me make summa that! It looks heeella fun. I dunno. Let’s just do cool shit. Enough of these hokey career trajectories and life goals. I don’t want a fucken house. I want a liiiife.